Monday 20 April 2009

SWALLOW FIELDS HOUSING IN TIPTON, WEST MIDLANDS BY CONCEPT DEVELOPMENT SOLUTIONS

THIS BUILDING IS THE DEVIL, IT IS THE ENEMY, IT IS SO UNREMITTINGLY FUCKING GRIM THAT IT'S HARD TO EVEN LOOK AT THE PICTURE WITHOUT IT DAMAGING YOU.
IT'S A COMBINATION OF BOTCHED CURTAIN WALLING, WINDOWS THAT DON'T FIT THE HOLES THEY'RE IN, ALL TOPPED OFF WITH A HAT THAT LOOKS LIKE AN ARMY SENTRY POST IN WEST BELFAST. JUST NEEDS A BIG FUCKING GUN TURRET ON TOP AND IT WOULD FIT RIGHT IN.
SMALL OBSERVATION - I CAN HONESTLY SAY THAT I'VE NEVER SEEN EFFLORESCENCE ON THE MORTAR BETWEEN TERRACOTTA BOLLOCKING TILES.
THIS BUILDING WAS SHORTLISTED FOR A FUCKING AWARD. IT COULD HAVE WALKED AWAY WITH 'BEST RSL-LED LARGE DEVELOPMENT' AT THE AFFORDABLE HOME OWNERSHIP AWARDS. ADMITTEDLY THAT IS NOT A PARTICULARLY COMPETITIVE CONTEXT, BUT FOR FUCK'S SAKE. THE REF MUST HAVE BEEN BLIND.
APPARENTLY 'THE CONCEPT DEVELOPMENT SOLUTIONS TEAM IS RECOGNISED THROUGHOUT THE MIDLANDS FOR ITS EXPERTISE AND INNOVATION.' EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING MIDLANDS SHOULD GET OUT MORE.

6 comments:

  1. Granted, this is awful, but it would be at least average in the US, if not slightly above average. Sad. Although I have to say I've never seen anything quite like that faux curtin-wall with railing thing at the top of the turret before.

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  2. The forced jauntiness of the render/brickwork on the right is probably the most pathetic aspect of the whole thing. At some point, someone most have thought of something along the lines of 'oh, let's have some fun with this one...'

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  3. You haven't seen it at night, there are clearly some tasty low budget floodlights at low level on the sentry tower. Probably in neon green or just regular sodium orange.

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  4. love the anger; vitriol well deserved.

    (... the more i look, the more the random treatment of the cladding stabs at my eyes- pretty damn 'innovative' and 'expert' indeed...)

    heinous.

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  5. Wonderful post, I love your site

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